He's gone..And things were never the same again.

Staring blankly at my old box containing all your old sweet letters makes me miss those days all the more. I can never forget your voice, your laughters, your caring which brought me in the best world I can ever live in. No other man could evewr make me long the way I long for your kisses and hugs, all because you had your special way in making me feel so special too.

I'm looking at your photographs, one day will come that I'll realize I'll be older than these faces I've kept in my albums. But I shan't be tired nor ever get bored keeping your pictures, because these remind me that I was loved before, that you make my world complete simply by just sitting there beside me. How can I forget your tears mixed with relief when I opened my eyes after getting drowned. I even saw you crammed when you were calling me just before I got lost from the deeper part of the lake (and this lake will always have special memory in me). We used to go to movie houses together, would share one sit if there was none available, I'm not sure if you knew then how I appreciated your presence. I looked up to your bravery but when it came to my expense, you were always scared, that's why you never allowed me to ride in your motor (I've heard you were among the champions when it comes to motor cross). For you, I was so fragile yet you encouraged me to be strong, and I had never felt so weak when you were there. You spent alot of money at my expense, you'd take me to the best restaurant cuz u said I was getting thin then. So, we'd eat the best lechon paksiw, fried chicken, and all those meat food cause you wanted me to gain weight. You thought I was still that sick baby you held in your arms, who spent those months in the hospital (when you left me, I stopped eating all those food, so now I only have fish and vegetables in my diet. You see how our parting affected me much).

Mom would always say you loved me more than you loved yourself, cared for me in no way you can ever care for yourself. We were happy, we shared the best times together, playing, talking, joking, haunting birds in the woods. You were the reason why I was strong and happy. You were my strength.

Then came one day. I saw you coming home. I thought you were supposed to stay in the hospital longer. But you were there, and I was thankful the man I loved so much was home. Morning came, noises around, medicines scattered on our bed, I went out to ask for help, and it was the biggest mistake I've ever committed in my entire life. I wanted to be beside you during your last breath.

It had been for several years now. I was young and more vulnerable. Life would have been totally different if DAD were alive today.